Essay #1

I revised my essay and the crossed out part is what I had before and the bold part is what I added. I kept some of my original text and that is seen in normal font. I tried to make it more focused on specifically Adah and her experience with exile. I referenced the intro to the prompt and tried to cut out summary but keep a little for evidence. I also changed around the structure f my intro paragraph so hopefully it isn't "cookie-cutter" anymore. I would love to hear feedback on anything I can improve on! Thanks.

The only constant in the world is change, but what if an individual can't or  won't change? Exile is something that most people think is scary. It is seen as something that is a punishment rather than a reward, but the message that isn't communicated is that exile is both. Palestinian literary theorist Edward Said once stated, "Exile is the rift between the self and its true home; its essential sadness can never be surmounted," this idea is illuminated by the character Adah Price in The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. She was exiled by her family but found comfort in complete strangers. She thought she was stepping into some obsolete place, but ironically she found her inner home through the struggles she faced. Adah did conquer the Congo, but not without the price of apart of her childhood and well being.A seen in The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver, Nathan Price is an individual who chooses not to change. In contrast, one of his young daughters learns at a young age what the consequences of change inflicted on her family. The family was thrown into the unforgiving Congo and forced to find their inner beings in order to just barely survive. In particular, Adah realizes that it is her duty to evolve and mix with the natives rather than stay stagnant and inflict pain. Through this experience, Adah learns that she not only weakened the ties between her family bonds, but she also found the reward of acceptance by those who were foreign beside her. By finding a home in the very exile she was expecting changed the way Adah perceived the world and it made her change the most comfortable ideas.

Adah was someone who was different than the rest and stood out. She was looked at in the most disapproving ways by strangers and even her own family. She was already in exile before her and her family reached the Congo to try to "save" the native race. The Congolese people were portrayed as inadequate and "primitive" for their lack of curiosity. Rather this lack of curiosity was the ability to decipher between what an individual can and can't control. The Congolese couldn't control the Price family trying to change their ways but they could control the environment they offered. The Congolese people looked at Adah as if she was one of the village. She was just like everyone else and yet she still was in "exile". Her home in America was the barrier between her finding the Congo and realizes who she wanted to be. She found herself slowly slipping away from the familial ties and increasingly submerged into the foreign homeland. When an individual detaches from one comfort, they attach to a new one to fill the void. As a result, Adah Price, for once in her life, had the oppurtinuty to fit in fill her void. She, as well as the other villagers, was not afraid to stand out and be different. Through this connection, Adah began to stray from her family and her home as she grew closer to the natives still struggled letting go and finding a new identity, although she had a new home from the very exile that was expected to strip her of one. 

In contrast, Adah began to question her existence and why she hadn't died as an infant. She saw the cultural rifts between her and the natives. They let twins die while her culture kept and cherished them. She was imperfect in a perfect world and that was overwhelming. She always believed she was the child that was forgotten and to justify her thoughts, she was chosen second by her own mother. Love provokes movement and passion but with Adah she had none and was utterly alone. When an individual seeks the attention to stand out and receives no accommodation, they lose their meaning of life as Adah did. She was losing her trust in those who were closest to her and she had no where to go but within. The Congo not only gave Adah her humanity, but stripped her of her conscience mind. 

  The Congo is an unforgiving place. One mistake and the walls come crashing down and there is nothing an individual can do about it. Adah Price learned that she was alone in this world and no one could accompany her on her journey of self realization. The idea of what she had going into the Congo was different than what she came out with. The Price family believed they were helping others and in return would have self gratitude and praise. Paradoxically, the people they were helping actually helped them come to conclusions of who they were really meant to be as individuals. Adah and her family got lost in the chaos of the unknown exile and had no idea how to get out. on the fateful day that they stepped off of the plane into a wild ritual of an unknown culture. Adah believed she could leave the Congo and go back to the way life was, but she fell through the cracks and into another world. but change is the only constant and after her world crashed with the death of Ruth May, there was nothing she could do but change the way she perceived life. There is always a price when it comes to change and once an individual gains one thing, they lose another as seen with Adah's new found self confidence, but loss of essential both her language and limp which had been apart parts of that demonstrated who she was.

Change is not a one way street. The Price family entered the Congo with the idea that they were going to change a small aspect of the world and they did. The sadness that exile passes onto individuals is something that can never be forgotten. In the process, they also fell apart as a family and lost their sense of comfort and meaning within life. In particular, Adah Price not only learned the lessons sadness of the Congo in an unconventional way than the others but also found a sense of comfort and home in the acceptance . She already came in exile and she was afraid to be left behind couldn't have lost much of who she was, but the little part that was left, was taken. Not only did Adah get further away emotionally from her family and lose her innocent mind, but she also gained insight to who she wanted to be and a sense of where her true home was . She lost her sense of security in the world, but gained the satisfaction of self dependance and drive to be better than what she was. There is always something to counteract the good in life contradiction in life; it is up to the individual to find both the good and the bad and choose which one is worth it. to make something out of it.

Questions:

-I might have summarized too much in the first paragraph?

-Is there not enough textual evidence from the book to support my ideas?

-Did I stray too far from the topic questions or did I not even answer them? (I didn't want to directly quote the prompt in my thesis, or should of I?

-Is my thesis clear?